Wednesday, February 23, 2011

ABC swap #7-Way over the top

Welcome everyone! I hope you were wondering where the next ABC swap was. Sorry-I was a little late due to starting this project way late and also teaching a new class this last weekend. Ok- let me say yes, as stated above this was way over the top-even for me. Book #7 was Cathy's book. The subject was Fantasy. Now this subject should be easy for me since fantasy books have long been a staple of mine. Whenever I need to escape I pick up a fantasy book and take a little journey. And by the way I just finshed the Mistborn trilogy by Brandon Sanderson. Wow! its been a long time since I read a fanstasy/scifi book that I have been so absolutely taken with. Its an amazing series! Anyway-back to reality. Since I was the 7th person in line for this book eveyone before me had created these amazing fairies, mermaids, space scenarios and even fantasy Cowboys. I could do more of the same but everyone elses art was so fabulous I knew I just couldn't compete. I needed to come up with something totally different. My first idea was to create a Cabinet of Curiosities and actually embed a small cabinet in a board book. But somehow I just couldn't make this work in my mind. At least not in time for the swap (last wednesday). Finally sunday night before the swap I finally got an idea that I knew I could make work in time-if barely. I worked monday, tuesday and wednesday right up until an hour before the swap. EEEK! Cathy had decided to use a series of board books for the swap and they worked perfectly for my project. I created collages on a spread and made pockets on both sides. You can see the full collages with non filled pockets above. Here is the same spread with the pockets filled. But what's in them you ask? Fairy B-Gones fairy detection flyleaf and instruction booklet of course!

I bet you sitting there with an open mouth wondering what I've done now. I've made a fairy detection kit complete with advertisement and instruction booklet. What else? Ask yourself if you are infested with those nasty fairies what do you do? You call Fairy B-Gone of course! Fairy B-Gone's patented detection kit complete with instructions and bonus elimination suggestions is the nations top Fairy detection method. Guaranteed to be 99% safe and effective!

Here's what their advertisement says:

Fairy B-Gone Do things seem a little different around your house lately? Are you continually misplacing jewelry never to find it again? Do you do stupid things and feel like someone else is in control of your thoughts and actions? Does your house always seem to be in need of a cleaning even thought you just cleaned it last week? If so your house could be infested with Fairies. Contrary to popular belief fairies are not benevolent or harmless creatures. Fairies are mischievous often malevolent beings that leave destruction and chaos in their wake. So what do you do? If you tell just anyone they simply won’t believe you. In fact you could find yourself incarcerated in a mental facility accused of being unstable. But with Fairy B-Gone’s do it yourself home fairy detection system you can find out the truth of the matter. Now for just $19.95 Fairy B-gone will send you their foolproof system that includes their patented home detection kit and booklet. To purchase your very own kit this minute please call 1 800 u-r nuts. Or you can purchase this kit online at www.scamcentral.com.

On the opposite side of the spread is the Fairy B-Gone instruction booklet. You can see part of it above. I have posted the text below.
Fairy B-gone This booklet includes: 4 sure fire ways to test for fairy infestations 3 bonus Fairy elimination suggestions
Test #1: Check for brown specks on your favorite treasures. Despite what science tell us, these brown spots are not caused by flies throwing up brown digestive juice. It is actually something far worse. This is fairy excrement. . (See the speck sample in your Fairy detection kit). These brown specks are a sure sign that the nasty little buggers hate you. Test #2: Bling stealing. Is your jewelry missing? Fairies cannot resist Bling. A sure test for fairy infestation is to place a few very gaudy pieces of jewelry around the house at night. If they are all gone in the morning you have a fairy infestation. Included in your fairy detection and elimination kit are several Bling items. Set them in strategic areas of your home at night and check them first thing in the morning. Test #3: Slippery floors: The next time you slip on the floor in you home immediately look at the bottom of your shoe. Fairies love to place sharp objects on the floor for you to step on. If you are lucky you have stepped on one as it was performing its nasty little deed and killed it. Simply scrap off the slime and look at it through the magnifying glass included in your kit. You can then compare it to the smashed sample also provided in the fairy detection kit. Test #4 Fairy Dust: If you find a load of sparkly dust around the house and you are not an artist then this is fairy dust (please see sample in your kit) important: Fairy Dust will not make you fly! Do not throw it around and then jump off a multistoried building. Wear a dust mask while sweeping or vacuuming fairy dust up. This highly addictive substance could cause lightness of spirit, true belief and throat irritations from excessive laughing.
Some suggestions for Fairy elimination: 1.Elimination of your imagination Method: Seek help from a Mental Health professional or some other person that does not have enough imagination to believe in fairies (accountants, government officials, college professors or any grown up) After a couple of visits these Pseudo intellectuals will drive the remnants of your childhood away and you will stop being troubled with fairies. 2.Lady’s Cottington’s patented Splat Fairy Method This is a particularly effective method that is safe and fun. Go to www.thefairy’smademedoit.com for more information. 3.Double stick tape method: This is the most inexpensive method available on the market today. Simply purchase Fairy B-Gone’s special double stick tape. Before you go to bed at night place this tape in any area that you don’t want fairies (fairies will naturally flock to the areas that you want to be fairy free), place a small crumb of cake on the tape then go to bed. Check the tape first thing in the morning and if there are fairies stuck to it just pull the tape up and throw it in the waste can.
Personally I find this instruction kit to be very helpful in all your fairy detection and elimination needs.
And here is the kit. It is packaged in a handsome antiqued wooden box. It is sure to fit into most every decor.
On the inside top the detection supplies are listed:
This Kit Includes: • Fairy specks sample • Fairy identification sample • Vial of Fairy dust sample (hermetically sealed ) • Bag o’Bling • Magnifying glass
From one of Fairy B-Gone's ads you can see the kit and supplies it contains.
Here are the items for your perusal. Remember Fairy-B-Gones motto is: "No Fairy is too small to be detected".
Over and out.

1 comment:

Maria Ontiveros said...

Oh my gosh!!! This clearly is over the top! I can't believe you made a whole kit! So awesome!
Maria